Jack had asked him to stay with him the night before - to stay in the caves and just be with him so that Jack could just lose himself looking into those blue-green eyes and know that those eyes were fixed upon him. He wanted Boone to stay so for once in his life he can actually feel like he meant something to someone - as a person and not a comodity. Boone makes him feel like a human and when that smile brightens his face it makes Jack want to smile too.
As he kissed him and muttered words of endearment, of love and of need, Boone grasped his hand and pushed Jack away. Then he just smiled at him and shook his head.
"Not tommorow," he says. "I've got something to do - but I promise when I get back."
Jack feels rejected - but he doesn't want to show Boone that. So he pretends to accept it and walks away without another word uttered or a kiss given. Boone knows how he feels and Boone feels like an asshole for letting him walk away anyway. He had something to do. But he didn't really understand why he was so compelled to do it and leave Jack in the dust. He just was.
Jack is afraid Boone is getting bored with him. That perhaps those many nights that they'd spent together didn't really mean anything to Boone. That they were just something that the young man did to cure himself of boredom. Boone was in his twenties and it is called the roaring 20's for a reason. Boone just didn't have that many options in the island so he'd gone with Jack. Jack was never much of a pessimist but feeling abandoned by the only man one he has really ever had leaves the brightside seem very undesirable.
He's walking inside his cave by himself now, no longer careful of where he dropped his few belongings cause he no longer had anyone to try to really impress. Boone never really cared about being tidy and was often the one making the mess - but then again it seems like Boone no longer cared for a lot of things.
As Boone prepares himself to leave with Locke, he throws a glance to where Jack probably lay asleep in his little cave. Boone was never hesitant in entering and usually just went in by himself, threw off his dirty clothes and waited impatiently for Jack's return. But today he's careful and nervous, knowing he had done some damage to his love.
He enters gingerly and finds Jack asleep on his makeshift bed, his back towards Boone. Boone sits down and rubs his hand over Jack's back. Jack mewls softly and he can't help but giggle and slide his hands inside the man's shirt and rest there. He bends down and whispers in Jack's ears: "No hard feelings alright babe? When I get back tonight I swear I'll make it up to you. In any other circumstances I wouldn't even give it a second thought but unfortunately, what John and I are doing is really really important. But that's all I can say. I love you Jack. So much. So please be patient with me."
As Boone slipped his hand away and got up, Jack's hand catchest his wrist and Jack mumbles: "I love you too Boone." And he lets go and lets Boone walk away.
Jack helps Sawyer with his little problem. He laughs at the prospect of telling Boone that his book had caused the man severe distress and he felt better imagining Boone's reaction.
When Boone comes back to him, everything changes. All the ideas he had for the night, all the things he could do and all the words that he could possibly say to him. They didn't mean anything when Locke came back with a bloodied Boone strewn over his shoulders.
He doesn't know what to feel - there were too many things going on that everything just piled up and overloaded and now he felt numb. Numb as he watched the man he loved struggle to breathe. Numb as he ripped open Boone's shirt and saw the deep wounds and gashes across the plain he carreses and reveres at night. Numb as Boone grabs his face and pulls him down. Numb as Boone tries to give that smile Jack adored. Numb as Boone whispers: "I'm sorry" before his eyes flutter close.
So yeah - I better go now. I had a dentist appointment but Ange and I were gonna rehearse but the bitch bailed on me. So basically, we're screwed for tommorow. God that girl doesn't understand that I need to pull up my marks.
As for the cinderella play, Adam has the flu. Possibility of him not coming for rehearsal tommorow - highly likely. TTC going on strike - highly likely. Chances of most of the classes getting to school if the TTC strikes. highly unlikely.