Where my mind is wallowing

slave_monkey @ 2005-04-26T07:25:00

2005-04-26T11:26:18Z

Friends Cut

Comment if you want to be kept in my f-list

Some people are naturally staying so you know who you are and don't worry about it.

OMGBOONEBACKYAY

2005-04-11T21:20:26Z

For all them lost fans:

From T.V. Guide's interview with Ian: (there were a bunch of questions but I'm just posting these ones)

>> I heard you got a standing ovation after your last scene.
Ian: You know, I don't really remember because I just wanted out. I just didn't want to be there. It was too emotional. I had to leave.

*huggles Ian* There there southern boy.

>> Where you satisfied with the story?
Ian: I was a little disappointed at first. I thought it didn't make any sense.
>> Why?
Ian: because the episode isn't about Shannon's grief. Here the one guy that loved her and took care of her just bit the big one and they don't explore that in the next episode? That kind of sucks. As an audience member I would want to see: "Is this personal gonna go off the deep end now?"

And are you ready?

Fave question:
>> Is there a chance that we haven't seen the last of Boone?
Yeah totally, by the end of the season, I'll be back in flashbacks. Here's the other thing I'm gonna be coming back next season, too"

>> wait is Boone really dead?
He's dead as a doornail. Trust me. He's in the ground. Dead, dead, dead.
>> So How will he be back next season?
[Producers] have kind of told me what they had in mind, but I don't think they know in whole yet. But I can imagine its gonna be pretty cool. I wholeheartedly look forward to it.

YAY *dances*

MARY! You and I are probably right - Boone will come back as an angel with lots of shedding wings to make everyone's beds with!!!

Boone/Jack fanfic - oh the angst!

2005-04-01T03:27:10Z

In errr - light (or is it dark) of Boone's impending death. I wrote a little Jack/Boone angsty ficlet. This is mostly for Rosa. But anyone who wants to read it can. Its not edited so there are probably a lot of mistakes since grammar was never much of a friend anyway. Spoilers from Epi 19 obviously.

Jack had asked him to stay with him the night before - to stay in the caves and just be with him so that Jack could just lose himself looking into those blue-green eyes and know that those eyes were fixed upon him. He wanted Boone to stay so for once in his life he can actually feel like he meant something to someone - as a person and not a comodity. Boone makes him feel like a human and when that smile brightens his face it makes Jack want to smile too.

As he kissed him and muttered words of endearment, of love and of need, Boone grasped his hand and pushed Jack away. Then he just smiled at him and shook his head.

"Not tommorow," he says. "I've got something to do - but I promise when I get back."

Jack feels rejected - but he doesn't want to show Boone that. So he pretends to accept it and walks away without another word uttered or a kiss given. Boone knows how he feels and Boone feels like an asshole for letting him walk away anyway. He had something to do. But he didn't really understand why he was so compelled to do it and leave Jack in the dust. He just was.

Jack is afraid Boone is getting bored with him. That perhaps those many nights that they'd spent together didn't really mean anything to Boone. That they were just something that the young man did to cure himself of boredom. Boone was in his twenties and it is called the roaring 20's for a reason. Boone just didn't have that many options in the island so he'd gone with Jack. Jack was never much of a pessimist but feeling abandoned by the only man one he has really ever had leaves the brightside seem very undesirable.

He's walking inside his cave by himself now, no longer careful of where he dropped his few belongings cause he no longer had anyone to try to really impress. Boone never really cared about being tidy and was often the one making the mess - but then again it seems like Boone no longer cared for a lot of things.

As Boone prepares himself to leave with Locke, he throws a glance to where Jack probably lay asleep in his little cave. Boone was never hesitant in entering and usually just went in by himself, threw off his dirty clothes and waited impatiently for Jack's return. But today he's careful and nervous, knowing he had done some damage to his love.

He enters gingerly and finds Jack asleep on his makeshift bed, his back towards Boone. Boone sits down and rubs his hand over Jack's back. Jack mewls softly and he can't help but giggle and slide his hands inside the man's shirt and rest there. He bends down and whispers in Jack's ears: "No hard feelings alright babe? When I get back tonight I swear I'll make it up to you. In any other circumstances I wouldn't even give it a second thought but unfortunately, what John and I are doing is really really important. But that's all I can say. I love you Jack. So much. So please be patient with me."

As Boone slipped his hand away and got up, Jack's hand catchest his wrist and Jack mumbles: "I love you too Boone." And he lets go and lets Boone walk away.

Jack helps Sawyer with his little problem. He laughs at the prospect of telling Boone that his book had caused the man severe distress and he felt better imagining Boone's reaction.

When Boone comes back to him, everything changes. All the ideas he had for the night, all the things he could do and all the words that he could possibly say to him. They didn't mean anything when Locke came back with a bloodied Boone strewn over his shoulders.

He doesn't know what to feel - there were too many things going on that everything just piled up and overloaded and now he felt numb. Numb as he watched the man he loved struggle to breathe. Numb as he ripped open Boone's shirt and saw the deep wounds and gashes across the plain he carreses and reveres at night. Numb as Boone grabs his face and pulls him down. Numb as Boone tries to give that smile Jack adored. Numb as Boone whispers: "I'm sorry" before his eyes flutter close.

So yeah - I better go now. I had a dentist appointment but Ange and I were gonna rehearse but the bitch bailed on me. So basically, we're screwed for tommorow. God that girl doesn't understand that I need to pull up my marks.

As for the cinderella play, Adam has the flu. Possibility of him not coming for rehearsal tommorow - highly likely. TTC going on strike - highly likely. Chances of most of the classes getting to school if the TTC strikes. highly unlikely.

slave_monkey @ 2005-02-12T08:54:00

2005-02-12T13:59:04Z

FRIENDS-CUT

My friends list is getting a little big for my comfort so I've decided to cut several people off. Its nothing against you - just that I don't have time to read everyone's entry especially now that most of my free time will be devoted to my little niece.

So...here goes. I'd really appreciate it if you take me off your friends list as well.

4_leafclovers
almightyjuju
breabby
diagirl
fansonsince5
tumbling_down
getoutofmyband
megan0905
nikka32
squarebubbles
virgomoonbeams
just_lyke_u

So sorry guys - I wish you good luck in your lives!! I kind of feel guilty for deleting people but I guess it must be done.

I'm leaving you guys on until tommorow.

slave_monkey @ 2005-12-31T18:35:00

2004-10-11T01:36:32Z

++Friends Only++

+Please for the love of god don't just add me. Tell me you are adding me.
+Remember that this is my journal. Don't bitch and moan about how wrong and stupid I am.
+Most likely will add you. Unless I get off vibes from you that your stay on my f-list is very short. Don't take it personally. That's just me.
+If I don't add you, it might mean that we share no interests or I just have never spoken to you online before.

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-20T18:27:00

2004-04-20T22:30:34Z

I'm trying to make a custom layout with my own style but it does not seem to want to work.

Lina, ignore what I told you about checking it and playing with the colors. I'm going to start from scratch cause I think I messed the entire thing up. I'm actually gonna start with the images and things so it will probably be easier to decide the colors once those are up. ugh...too much hmwk...must go do them now.

when I finish my homework, I'm gonna go and try again. Once I get it to look nice and proper, I'm going to start on that mood theme.... again

mertonfanatic thanks for the linky to the community with the templates and things. It would be great if you can help me out again with it if you don't really mind. If you do then thats okay.

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-18T09:52:00

2004-04-18T14:09:29Z

I saw Coupling last night with Jack. Thank god to my mom coming home at 11 asking if she could use the computer...otherwise I wouldn't have gotten off my lazy ass and turned it on. I was bored and remember that coupling was on every saturday night. n_n baby shows like arthur in the morning and raunchy british shows with lesbians, gays, lock obsessors and toilet-phobic people. Jack was hilarious: "You told her sally was a lesbian?" and I heard that same: "what??" from that sparrington audio file that was made some time back over at the sparrington community. Steve has an obsession with doorlocks and man space. He spent about 5 minutes lecturing his guests that the bathroom is the only little square of "man space" and how he doesn't get potpourri.

LOl, I made an icon of Kate Bosworth last night. It started out as a little joke with Yassie because she hates her. But shes pretty hot. I was looking for pictures of Kate and found a gorgeous one. Shes so sexy...Do you think she'll ever go bi or lesbian? Thatd be really hot to see her with another girl.

Jack/Steve: Do you know that there is a difference between real lesbians and low quality lesbian porn?
The other dude (the toilet-phobic guy): You don't know that
Jack: What?

I'm watching a show about celebrities and their star signs...says Kate Bosworth and Orlando Bloom would go well with a Taurus like me...

Pieces (or however it is spelt) doesn't go with me...and thats what Jack is.

Astrology is a load of crap but there are times when its pretty accurate. But what I don't get is that there must be millions of people who share astrological signs and the same things are supposed to happen at the same time. That is somehow not right.

Lina made a good point, lj is starting to die down. Before I would get a shitload of posts on my friends thing and now theres hardly any.

Ah well....I'll have to wait another week to see the next coupling. And the damn show is only half an hour >.<

So I went to bed after watching coupling only to have my night ruined by my sister and my mother who yelled at me for being an irresponsible bitch. I know I am but its not my fucking fault if I was too busy to check on Tomo every 2 minutes to see if shes awake and wants to have fucking dinner. I dont even want her here. And my parents need to understand that I'm growing up and I'm not a little girl anymore. If I say things that you find inappropriate or I'm sarcastic, thats just me growing up. And then they slap me with a reply that goes something like: You weren't like that when you were younger. Whats come over you?

....

Of course I wasn't like this when I was younger. When I was younger I had no idea who I was and I was young. Little kids don't speak their minds.

They wish I acted like I did when I was younger but they yell at me everyday telling to me to grow up.

Please...get with the times people...change is constant, I'm not the little girl dragging a tiffany doll anymore.

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-17T19:08:00

2004-04-17T23:11:18Z

6 Draco icons from COS again posted here cause my bandwidth might die

1) 2) 3)

4) 5) 6)

Base for # 4)

Comment+Credit

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-16T19:53:00

2004-04-17T00:04:37Z

Thanks for more Jack pics Ayan. I dunno where Jack and I would be without you n_n

Watched Potc again today, cause Peter Smith Kingsley was taken away. Mum thinks that Jack Davenport is okay looking but then ran off scared after I showed her the pics of him on my school planner. o.O

Argh. I had the health test today. Ask me about having sex. Don't ask me about abstaining from it. >.<

Bruce Almighty is a fucking fucked up movie man.

OOOH...remember the 5 horny British boys yesterday with the webcam. Yesh, the kid stuffed the webcam down his pants...unfortunately I didn't see anything. It was too dark. And then the two boys started getting naked and then the other boy started rubbing the other kid. And they called me a faggot. Anal pains.

I found a new fave word: Anal pain.

There are so many contraceptives, the regular ones and then the oral contraceptive. What about an anal contraceptive? It might help, I dunno for what though.

Niki is starting to turn pervy like the rest of us. Good girl. But I don't like it when she tries to sound clever.

Me: Whats a dangerous thing to happen to a woman while she is pregnant, other than a miscarriage?
Her: Erm....she can have sex and the penis might reach the baby and if the baby is female the baby might get pregnant?

.............

No comment.....

HEhe..I think I'll eat now. I'm hungry. I just finished stuffing myself a couple of minutes ago though >.<

Ayan wants me to do a hair commercial. ::flips hair around:: My hair is too beautiful for the eyes of the trillions of hair products consumers.

Ayan? Come over sunday hmm? after your modelling thing. Bring Jack?

Guh..niki's coming over tommorow to do a project on AEROSMITH. Now how strange is that. DOing a project on Steven Tyler and his bandmates.

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-16T19:31:00

2004-04-16T23:45:36Z

23 Norrington icons I posted here so my photobucket doesn't die.

Teasers:

1) 2) 3)

Note: these all have white borders...you can't really see if you've got a white background.

1) 2) 3) 4)

5) 6) 7) 8)

9) 10) 11) 12)

13) 14) 15) 16)

17) 18) 19) 20)

21) 22) 23)

Comment+Credit if using. Tell me if you are editing.

I don't care

2004-04-15T22:20:41Z

I am so fucking pissed at Alex Noussis at the moment. I don't care if you like her! I don't care if you think that shes going to get hurt! Its not my place to tell her that she should break up with him cause he's a fucking perverted ass freak.

Heres the scoop. This guy Alex is really upset that his friend Rachel is going out with my "ex" Derek. He says that Cooper is just using her. I agree. I told him the reason why I am still mad and upset at Cooper. Now he wants me to tell Rachel that so that he won't get hurt.

FOr the past 2 days I've been trying to convice this anal pain hanging around that its not my place to say anything.

I don't care what happens to her. I just don't care. The three of us have gone to same school since the 5th grade. Alex and I have been friends for years now, but all Rachel has ever done is stick her nose up at me. SO I don't care.

besides, I haven't spoken to derek since we "broke up". And that was what? Last year august?

God. Its not my place to say anything. Besides, If I say anything she'll say: "You are just bitter cause Derek broke up with you when he was your only ticket to popularity."......I dont want fucking popularity. And the only reason why I fooled around with Derek cause: A) suffering rejection from Michael B) I was bored cause adrienne wasn't there to finish our project.

WTF, Kika just added me...God.

Her: r u reina?
me: go figure
her: i've never seen you before
me: im the black haired girl hanging around brian
her: oh.rite.I don't like your attitude.

Believe it or not, shes the smartest girl in the school and spelled attitude wrong originally. God. Attitude my ass.

Fucking Frenchies.

Jack is the most gorgeous man in the world.

2004-04-15T00:29:35Z

This was literally the best day of my life, (cept for the fact that mom is now extremely mad at me)

When I got home from school, I went on to find Nancy online. Yay. I was very excited and we talked but then I realized my computer was retarded again so I had to fix that. Thanks Nancy for the help btw. Nancy is probably one of the nicest people I've ever come across. She asked me if I wanted to have my paid account renewed as a b-day present. Of course I do. Thank you so much.

AYan was in happy mood and printed me out some Jack photos. Yayyies. But then she left, and I found the most gorgeous pics of Jack

When I saw these pics I was hyperventalating

This man is too gorgeous he should be censored or something.

I was reading a longer bio thing and came across something: Jack loves to go to Gay bars but is not gay. Frankly, gay bars offer the best music. ANd that he takes his best friend Andrew lincoln there even though andrew was afraid to. Jack loves gay bars! HEHE....I have to visit a gay bar in london one day, who knows, I might spot Jack making out with some guy. Thatd be heaven.

IF you have the heart and the kindness and the niceness? get me a little piccy of the first and 3rd pic hmm?

Hehe...i got stalked by a person. That person in lj who friended me. She stalks people.

Jack is so freakin hot

Chocolate soup

2004-04-14T11:43:08Z

Never eat moms chocolate soup thing while reading Sparrington. Just don't. Especially if you have to go to school/work after cause it gets chocolate all over you.

::sigh::

James talking pirate talk n_n...

n_n...okay...why do I keep using that???

Poetry test today >.< Migration unit test today >.< fuck both of them to hell and back. >.< I don't even have a cinquin to do it on.

I feel like writing something, but writing what? I could continue that sparrington fic: anywhere. Ah well. I better be heading on out to school. I have to take my alto sax to school. The playing test piece is too hard. YAYYIES!!!!!! I can play the O Canada song without messing up on the eigth notes. The good thing about that song is that the rhythm has been drilled into my brain every single school day since the 4th Grade. I was just playing it while singing it in my head. Kum bah ya too...save I can't play the harmony.

Some anonymous person replied and said they loved my Jack Davenport icons even though I think they suck. She also says that she wont steal Jack from me cause he's mine. Don't worry, thats just something I say to calm myself down.

SHit..late for school.

I want everyone to help me-vote on

2004-04-14T03:16:04Z

Finally, the internet works again. I suffered for about 2 hours and then I realized I could surf the net through Kazaa. But its like slow and all and it stops occasionally.

Anyways, because of *recent* bashing done by an anonymous person, I'm considering about making this journal is Friends only. But the thing is I've tried it before, for some reason I don't really like the idea. Until I got those super rude comments about the Tom Felton/Jack Davenport fic I posted.

So I'm considering making this journal "Friends only" to save my life.

Heres a little poll:

View Poll: #278430

Finnally. Just give your answers there.

Despite the anti evanescence conversations that I've had with Yassie today, I downloaded two new Ev songs: BEfore the dawn and Fields of innocence. I really like Fields of innocence:

I still remember the world
From the eyes of a child
Slowly those feelings
Were clouded by what I know now

Where has my heart gone
An uneven trade for the real world
I want to go back to
Believing in everything and knowing nothing at all

I still remember the sun
Always warm on my back
Somehow it seems colder now

Where has my heart gone
Trapped in the eyes of a stranger
I want to go back to
Believing in everything

[Latin hymn]

Pretty lyrics no? Somewhat pointless but oh well.

Hmm...Poetry test tommorow. Shoot me now.

One last thing. I really really really really really really really miss Nancy (poisondreams) I haven't talked to her in over 3 weeks. Hopefully she'll be on one day.

AND BTW! Yassie, I checked out the channel airing british coupling on saturdays....hehe...kid shows during the day, raunchy british shows by night.

My sisters bugging me, gotta be off

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-13T07:23:00

2004-04-13T11:26:41Z

Okay two things,

I hate it when people go on to read something, not read the warnings and then bash the author for it...

Second. Would anyone like to BETA my poor little sucky obscure pairing fic that was developed while Brian raided all my food?

Title: How to lose friends and alienate people-PWP
Pairing: Jack Davenport/Tom Felton
Rating: well going to be R if I decide to continue. PG-13 for a wee bit of language.
Summary: Jack and Tom meet at a showing of Jacks show with the same title.
Disclaimers: I don’t know Jack Davenport and Tom Felton. If I did, They’d be tied up in a chair in very light bondage.
Authors Notes: This is the raw form. Not beta-ed. I don’t actually know these places, never been to England before. I just read the little article on the show. I’ve never seen the show either, obviously.
Setting: May of 2004 (future fic)

Tom stepped down from his trailer to find Daniel sitting on the metal steps, grinning up at him like a child being offered sweets.

“What are you doing there?” Tom asked, raising an eyebrow suspiciously.

“Oh, um, I was,” Daniel got up slowly, brushed dirt away from the back of his costume and smiled again. “I was hoping to catch you before you took off. I wanted to ask you something.”

“K, hang on,” the blonde boy dropped his duffle bag on the ground, leaning back against the wall. He looked around to check if the coast was clear, drew out a cigarette, lighted it and took a drag. “Shoot.”

Dan’s nose crinkled up as the scent of burning menthol filled his nostrils. Coughing a little, he said: “I have two tickets to a live theatre show. Problem is, I’ve got no one to go with. I was wondering if you wanted to tag along and watch it with me.”

“Hmm…”another drag. “What show?”

“Its called: “How to lose friends and alienate people”-or something like that.” Answered Dan.

“Why don’t you just ask Elijah to go with you? He’s here in London isn’t he?”

“Actually, Elijah bought these tickets, said that Orlando recommended the show, something about costarring with the lead. Elijah and I were suppose to go, but something came up, and he had to do something. Yeah, something came up and he had to leave the U.K.”

“I see,” Tom took another, even longer drag at the cigar before crushing it with the balls of his feet on the ground. “Where is it…and when?”

“Erm, hang on,” Dan dug into his Hogwarts robes and produced two blue and green tickets. “Well, the show starts at 7:00 pm. Its down at the Soho Theatre down at Dean Street in London. There’s a café near there. We could meet there at around 6 o’clock. So what do you say mate?”

“Why so early?” Tom asked, grabbing his bag and throwing it over his shoulders.

“The tickets are marked for backstage passes too. I guess Elijah wanted a look around. We could just hang out backstage, watch the crew and the actor preparing, get autographs that kind of thing.”

Tom scoffed, “I see enough of the entertainment business in this fucking place.”

“Well, we could just…I don’t know. It’ll be fun. What do you say? Please?”

“Sure, I’ve got nothing better to do with my time anyways.”

~*~*~*~*~*~*

“Well, that was an interesting experience,” Tom remarked, dragging a made over Daniel by the ears away from the make up chairs.

“But, it was…I was starting to look pretty…and they had sparkly glitter!” Dan protested.

“Borrow some from Emma when we get back to the set…or some from Rupert for that matter. The shows starting in 5 mins. We have to get our seats.”

“Fine, just let me get all of this face powder from my face, there are photographers outside. Someone tipped off I was coming to the show. Fucktards those paparazzi men, the lot of them,” Daniel turned away and headed for the boys room to “remove” the make up.

Laughing, Tom continued on his way, not watching where he was going and soon bumped into someone. He would have been knocked off balance had the man not caught him.

“Watch your step man!” Tom growled.

“Sorry, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t looking…” a husky voice apologized.

“Well you should-oh.” Tom looked into sparkling emerald eyes. The man was tall, just a little taller than himself. His mousy brown hair tousled, his glasses askew, his black pinstripe suit crinkled purposely. Damn, he was gorgeous too.

“Well, hello there,” he said, studying Tom, smiling a little now.

“Hi…I, I’m Tom,” Tom said, offering a handshake.

“I’m Jack,” replied Jack. Looking down at his watch he grimaced and said: “I’ll watch my step from now on. But I have to go, um; it was nice meeting you, Tom. You’ll see me, but I don’t I’ll see you.”

“Huh?” Tom found himself staring after Jack’s back.

“Tom! There you are!” shouted Dan over the growing crowd of crewmembers and stage directors. “Come on you bastard. The shows on in a second!”

He nodded and pushed his way to his friend, finding his seat near the middle.

“Where were you?”

“I was, uh, I was talking to someone.”

“Hmm…well, was he hot?”

“What do you mean?”

“You’re beaming, he must have been hot.”

Tom grinned a little, blushing, “Course he was hot. Now shush.”

The opening theme began to play, the black curtain open and out stepped a man, talking furiously to his cell phone, shouting at the receiver. “WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO?”

The show went on for a few minutes, but Tom hardly noticed what was going on, until Dan noticed his starry eyed look and nudged his shoulder with his elbow. Tom rolled his eyes at him and flicked his eyes skittishly at the screen. What a surprise that was.

Up on the stage, the handsome man he had met before was sliding in and out of various characters, changing his voice, and his body language. Staring wide-eyed, Tom watched as Jack paced around the stage, shouting, sighing, screaming and humming. Then Jack was right up in front of them and they looked at one another. Jack grinned a little and went back into his roles.

Tom pulled out the showcase guide and looked at the cast list. There was only one person listed and that was Jack. Jack Davenport as eccentric former “Vanity fair” editor: Toby Young.

Twisting slightly in his seat to watch his friend, Daniel asked: “What’s the matter Tom? You look like you’ve seen Mr. Universe!”

“That’s cause I have.”

*~*~**~*~

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-12T21:00:00

2004-04-13T01:02:12Z

Stolen from hyujin

All you guys post something. Anything. I'll screen the comments if you want me to.

You can say anything.

What you like/hate about me.

A story.

A secret.

A confession.

A fear.

A love.

Anything!

Post anonymously, and honestly.

Then put this in your journal to see what your friends have to say.

Bland

2004-04-12T02:13:16Z

I am so fucking bored and fucking mad right now.

God...thanks to Jana, my icon making mood has been ruined. Blah. I just asked her: "Don't send me chainmails cause I find them stupid and pointless things that clog up my email box." and then she sends me something back with a touch of the ol' attitude that ended a friendship that went nowhere anyway. Thank god I didn't stick with her, otherwise I'd be a mean bitchy hoe obsessed with Johnny Depp and not Jack Davenport and extremely homophobic instead of a slasher...ewww...scary thoughts...

Some wonderful person (medelle) was kind enough to make me some screencaps of Jack Davenport from the Talented Mr. Ripley and POTC. Now..if my brother had been nice enough to install a DVD player on my comp, I would be able to do them myself. But thank you for medelle for making those caps for me when I asked you to and making more when I needed more.

What kind of an Easter is this?

Mums at work so I'm starving. And its freaking easter....wait...nevermind, she cooked spaghetti. It tasted retarded but its food. Better than most sunday dinners.

Brians coming over tommorow. Yayyies...finally. Its always "Hockey night with andy" or "hockey night with phil"...why is it never "Jack night with Reiny"?

I've drabbled in obscure pairings slash. Guess the pairing..

.....

You don't know? I'll tell you. Tom Felton/Jack Davenport what better thing to do than pair the two hottest british guys together and make them shag??...other than screw them yourself of course...

Unfortunately, I got the email with the url for the screencaps and I made iconses instead.

Its easter and I'm watching the FIFTH ELEMENT and "that thing you do."....shouldn't it be like jesus christ night. Oh well...I spent the day watching little bios on Mel Gibson, Jim caviezel and the passion of the christ.

Hehe...I remember my comp having a heart attack this morning. Lol...since the z and the x keys don't work. I have to use the on screen keyboard. I pressed shift at the same time and my comp started shaking and having a stroke. >.< it was scary...

I suck...

::sigh:: I think I'll go try to write the tom/jack so I can do something with it before I go back to Morgan with the shitload of homework.

Tales of Love & God...what its Easter!

2004-04-09T19:33:01Z

Its past 3 and I'm supposed to be quiet and pray and be all solemn cause Jesus died....it was 3 o'clock friday in philippines yesterday and i was quiet at 3...well...sorta....

I woke up this morning and saw Denis' post. I don't know what point he was trying to make... I was 50:50 on a lot of them

First of all. Love isn't something that is only most effective if the person is right in front of you. Its not the deepest emotion a person can feel. I think that all Love really is an intense caring for someone. Love is just a measure on how much you care for someone. If you care enough about someone that you would do anything for them, then thats love. You can love someone and not want to marry them. You can love someone and not want to have sex with them. For me, I care for my family and would do anything for them, but outside that is really just Lina and Brian. Honestly, for those two, I'd do anything. thats love. Everytime Lina says she loves me too and then she says that shes lying. I feel hurt. Cause the way I interpret it is that she doesn't care for me at all. In Brians case, I know he won't do everything for me but the way he's put up with me and all my crude jokes about his budding homosexuality or metrosexuality.

And this whole God idea. First of all, I don't really believe that there is a god, at least the way Christians and Catholics make them to be. Think about it. Religion is really the only thing that has survived from stone/iron ages through ancient through medievil, through reneissance, through Modern age. Almost every single country has their own religion. Basically every body needs to have some sort of spiritual outlet. Like a lot of non believers say: You don't have to believe in God the way he is portrayed. You just need something to believe in.

No one can have nothing to believe in. If they have nothing to believe in then there isn't a point or a purpose for them living. You can't deny religion.

Another thing is that a lot of people disagree with religion because of the way its being pushed unto them by parents or by their friends. And its in peoples natures to rebel against the norm.

Religion isn't always about God. Its about what you personally believe in. But no one and I guarantee that there isn't a person out there who does not having anything to believe in.

I'm sorry but ayan, I think you're a bit of a hypocrite for saying that you don't think there is a god. Here you are, you believe in vampires and everything paranormal. You believe in a lot of evil things, and that needs to go away. You continue to look at the negative side instead of the positive. And if you believe in evil, then you must believe in good. If there is no good, the entire world would be evil. And it truly is, but because of religion and something to put your faith in, a lot of people choose to believe in the good things and the bad things.

Another thing is that a lot of people seem to deny Good..but they don't deny Evil. I don't really get it because again the entire world would be evil.

Notice that those who believe in god are the ones who actually end up somewhere in their lives? Who actually do things that save the lives of many people. take mother teresa, or jesus at that. Jesus is something that you can't deny. There was a man a long time ago who was prosecuted for his beliefs. In fact, there are many men. Down from Jesus, to Nelson Mandela to Orlando Bloom's first father Harry Bloom who was jailed and killed for his beliefs alongside Mandela. But jesus himself, theres historic and physical evidence that he existed and was treated the way they say he was treated. I don't know the exact name, but there is a veil worn by a woman who ran to jesus' side and wiped his face with it and up to this day, the contour of his face is preserved with his very own blood.

I figure you all might want me to shut up now. But I'm not done. However, my eyes are in pain from too much clorine from the gym. I'll continue this to adress some of Denis' other point of views.

And one final note, Denis. You do believe in God. You don't want to. But you know you do. all of the incidents that you've talked about, the pressure pellet guns, the car wrecks the "I almost lost an eye" shit, even down to your on going "love" for Lina...all of it has happened for a reason and you've gotten through all of it. Don't you think theres something else going on...something you have no control over.

For all you people who believe in God, but deny it. You should watch "The passion of the christ". I was like you before I saw this film. Its more than a good see. Its a real eye opener and no mistake.

I'm sorry if you think that I'm trying to preach religious ideas of Catholicism and Christianity. But again, its part of who I am, I cant deny that.

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-07T22:24:00

2004-04-08T02:36:22Z

My lj went into a bit of a revamping. Its kind of like the old Evanescence layout except its Jack. The Userinfo got a revamp too. It has a sweet pic of Jacks upper body on a bed from TTMR with funky words and some dividers.

My eyes are in god awful pain. Yesterday, finishing up my Poetry Collage on "Lament for Boromir" and then Brian's on "the road not taken" and then Ayan's for who knows what. Its okay guys though. I don't mind. Its a nice time filler.

Novel Study week is coming up in 3 weeks. DAmn it. I have to get a book. I want to do it on TTMR but I have no money. >_<

I wish people would stop sending me chain mails. They know I hate those evil things and I've told them many times if they send more to me, blood will be spilt.

Another thing I hate is the way people look at me and Brian. I admit, Brian and I are way too close to be "just friends" but we are. Its nothing more than that. I know its a joke and all and overused. Damnit. THis makes me a hypocrite now cause I've always been saying that Brian and Andrew would look good together. Yes, I'll stop now.

The evil korean at Writers Workshop at school is creepy. I swear, she doesn't know my name, but she knows what I write. Every single meeting she asks me how my "Celtic" stories are coming along. I nod, smile, and lie and say they are going great.

My hands hurt.

OOh...Slash is taking over the world. I have a friend at school named Rachelle Farkas, she writes Inuyasha fanfiction at ff.net and I asked her if she knew what slash was. She said she reads it. Meep...but she doesn't read over the top ones cause she thinks they are gross. Like R rated ones and things like that. I'm afraid to give her my email now.

Sara said something about what it was with me and gay men. I said I think they are hot and gorgeous. She says theres something wrong with me. Something wrong with my brain...Well now thats a major break through Sara. You get a cookie for that!

Niki has a strong Tom Felton obsession. But its nice having someone who actually liked Tom to talk to. But shes annoying at times. Like real annoying. ANd not to be mean or anything, she smells like old gym socks.

I need rest now.

The guy who sings with Amy in most of the origin songs sounds like Jacky with a decent singing voice!

GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY WOMAN YOU MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!!!

2004-04-06T02:15:36Z

Don't you just hate it when people ask you your opinion about something and your opinion happens to go against them and they say you've ruined their day. ANd then the next day they completely ignore the fact that you've been crying all day cause
they actually ruined yours and go on ahead with their little project? Don't you just hate it when they ask for your opinion and your ideas and you tell them and they say you are overreacting or overdramatic or irrational? Don't you just hate it when they ask you for your opinion and your ideas and when you don't answer them they say you are a stupid and uncaring and selfish and ungrateful bitch?

Don't you just hate when you can just throw rocks at yourself and end it all but you can't cause you know you are better than that?

Don't you just hate it when people start livejournal entries with: Dont you just hate it?

On a happier note: I am in love with Jack Davenport and The Darkness. I don't know what it is with me and super hot British men but there is something.

::sings:: Get your hands off my woman you motherfucker ::quits singing::

::sings:: And we're called gondoleris but thats a vagary its quite honorary the trade that we ply ::quits singing::

::awkward moment::

AMERICANO AMERICANO!

-Love mr. poofy cheeks

slave_monkey @ 2004-04-03T15:07:00

2004-04-03T20:46:16Z

I FINISHED MY JACK DAVENPORT MOOD THEME! YAYYIES!!!!! NOW I CAN LIVE IN PEACE...

In the wise words of Jack Davenport: "Isn't it pretty?"

I'm so proud of myself...and it only took...::counts:: 5-6 hours!

On a sadder note, remind me again why I work at the library? Its boring, its shitty and they have shitty books. I spent 120 mins and more reading out #'s to this lady who had to check if the books were in the system properly. 120 fucking minutes! I will die if I see the # 331940 ever again!!!! It was a god damn pain in the ass. Then I started signing out the books for this group of fucked up little Grade 6's. One of them was Davids brother. I asked for the last names instead of using the pen to make life easier.
Me: Caplan right?
him: ::looks around nervously:: No. Its Stevenson.
Me: Oh, I'm sorry. Its just I thought you were a Caplan. You look like one. You look just like David. Whats your first name?
Him: um....Robert?
Me: :thinks:: didnt a Robert Stevenson take a book out like....5 seconds ago? You ARE DEFINATELY A CAPLAN!
Him: Yeah I am.
Me: Say hi to David for me K?
Him: David's in France.

I was taken aback. David, In france? I couldn't believe it. Theres always the possibility that he was lying but David was a smart guy and spoke French better than his French teacher did. I don't know why cause David paired up with Michael made life a living hell.

Then I went back to reading out the goddamn fucking #'s.

For those of you who have no idea who the hell I'm talking about. David was the guy who trained me and Michael as library monitors/helpers. If you went to Willowjail well he was the guy who dressed up as a Cow our first halloween Dance.

I'm thinking of buying extra userpics for 6 U.S.D. when I renew my paid account. It gives 35 more spaces. That way I'll have 50! Should I?

i love my jack theme.

The Talented Mr. Ripley

2004-04-01T02:00:38Z

I just saw the Talented Mr. ripley...

Jack Davenport was super handsome in that movie! Absolutely adorable. And when he smiled when he saw Tom waving at him from the bottom of the dais. And the way his head moved....Adorable.

Throughout the entire movie I was waiting for them to kiss...just fucking kiss already! Land him a big one Jack!

AND you see Matt Damon in the nude...unfortunately jack was blocked by several doors and that bitch Gwyneth Paltrow.

His costumes and his style was just so chic.

"was that Meredith. I saw you kissing a girl that looked like Meredith"

"Peter and Tom, why would it be?"

"Tell me good things about Tom."

"tom is beautiful."
"tom is not a nobody."
"Tom has nightmare-which is not good."
"Tom has someone who loves him-thats good."
"Tom is choking me"
"Tom is choking me"
"Tom your choking me!" AHHH!

Bastard killed my musician.

Off to watch the movie again and stare in wonder at the hair!

survey time

2004-03-31T19:38:55Z

YEs, folks....another survey stolen from eclipsethesun

[Name] Reina
[Nickname] Reiny, Slave_monkey, monkey, Nick, moogie
[Screen name] Slave_monkey
[Birthday] May 12
[Age] now, what a stupid question
[Astrological sign?] Taurus
[Chinese zodiac sign?] I dunno...horse I think
[Location] Toronto Canada
[Sexual Preference] Bisexual
[Marital Status] Single
[Religion] Roman Catholic (born, but I don't believe)
[Eye color] dark brown to black
[Height] About 4'11
[Shoe size] 6
[Parents still together?] No
[Siblings?] 2 bros and 2 sis
[ Nieces/Nephews? ] 1
[ Kids of your own? ] I don't want kids
[ Grandkids? ] .....
[ Pets?] 1: Brian
[ In school/graduated? ] School
[ Have any credit cards? ] No
[ What do you drive? ] don't drive yet

Favorites
[ Color ] gray
[ Number ] 100
[ Animal ] dogs
[ Vehicle ] Silver mustang
[ Flower ] Sampaguita
[ Scent ] baby's breath
[ Shape ] Pentagon
[ Drinks ] Coke
[ Soda ] Vanilla coke
[ Book ] Any Celtic myth
[ Band ] Three days grace, evanescence, the darkness, maroon 5, linkin park, nickelback.
[ Song ] "wake up" three days grace
[ Movie(s) ] LOTR, Pirates of the Caribbean, talented mr. ripley, Eye of the beholder

Do you...
[ Color your hair? ] no
[ Twirl your hair? ] Sometimes
[ Have tattoos? ] no
[ Piercings? ] Yes
[ Have a boyfriend/girlfriend/both? ] No
[ Cheat on tests/homework? ] once..with Ramona, asked her to open up my science text while she did her geography
[ Drink/Smoke? ] Low tolerance with alcohol and second hand smoker
[ Like roller coasters? ] Love them
[ Wish you could live somewhere else? ] Damn right.
[ Want more piercings? ] Yes, my eyebrow and bellybutton
[ Like cleaning? ] no
[ Write in cursive or print? ] Print in italics.
[ Carry a donor card? ] no
[ Swear a lot? ] FUck yeah
[ Own a web cam? ] No
[ Know how to drive? ] No...I know how to pull it out from the garage
[ Diet? ] No..::munch::
[ Own a cell phone? ] sadly no. I don't feel I need since I go school and home
[ Ever get off the damn computer? ] Just to sleep
[ Hablar Espanol? ] Ci.

Have you ever...
[ Gotten a speeding ticket?] no
[ DUI? ] eh?
[ Been in a wreck? ] Yes.
[ Been arrested? ] No
[ Been in a fist fight? ] Yes
[ Kicked someone in the nuts? ] Yes...hehe...that creepy kid in Grade 5
[ Stolen anything? ] Nope
[ Held a gun? ] I don't remember....I think I did
[ Drank? ] Yes
[ Been so drunk you couldn't remember your name? ] I passed out immediately
[ Considered a life of crime? ] No
[ Considered being a hooker? ] Yes
[ Cheated on someone? ] No
[ Been married? ] No
[ Cried over a girl? ] Yeah
[ Cried over a boy? ] Yes
[ Lied to someone? ] Yes
[ Been in love? ] No
[ Fallen for your best friend? ] I love you Brian
[ Made out with JUST a friend? ] yes
[ Been rejected? ] Yes
[ Been in lust? ] Yes
[ Used someone? ] Yes
[ Been used? ] a lot
[ Been cheated on? ] Yes....
[ Been kissed? ] Yes

Now
[Current mood] Sick
[Current music] Evanescence
[Current taste] dust
[Current hair] straight and unwashed
[Current annoyance] My stomach and my head
[Current smell] Shit
[Current thing I ought to be doing] Resting
[Current windows open] Its cold
[Current desktop picture] Blue screen...its going to be Jack Davenport in a sec.
[Current favorite band] Three Days Grace
[Current book] None..I just finished my Midnight Falcon yesterday
[Current cds in stereo] Three Days Grace
[Current favorite celeb] Jack Davenport
[Current hate] my life
[Current job] freak

Do you
[Do drugs?] iron pills...
[Have a dream that keeps coming back?] Yes
[Play an instrument?] Alto Saxophone
[Believe there is life on other planets?] No
[Remember your first love?] Never been in love
[Still love him/her?] ....
[Read the newspaper?] Nope...well last night I was looking over a ladys shoulder and reading Entertainment news
[Have any gay or lesbian friends?] Yes and a few closeted ones
[Believe in miracles?] No
[Believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?:] No
[Consider yourself tolerant of others?] no
[Consider love a mistake?] res
[Have a favorite candy?] yes
[Believe in astrology?] no
[Believe in magic?] No
[Believe in God?] Yes
[Do well in school?] Yes
[Go to or plan to go to college] Yes obviously, I wanna take literature and film studies
[Wear hats?] No
[Have any piercings?] Didn't you ask already
[Have any tattoos?] didn't you ask already
[Hate yourself?] Yes
[Have an obsession?] I'm neurotic...I obsess easily
[Have a secret crush?] No
[Do they know yet?] ...
[Collect anything?] Pictures of my boys
[Have a best friend?] Yes but I hate her.
[Close friends?] Yes
[Like your handwriting?] dos it matter
[Care about looks?] no not really.

=Love life=
[First crush] Alisson
[First kiss] Derek Cooper.
[Single or attached?] Single
[Ever been in love?] NO!!!
[Do you believe in love at first sight?] No
[Do you believe in "the one?"] No not really
[Describe your ideal significant other] Nice and sweet, intellectual, has style to make up for my lack of.
Are you a
[Wuss] I can be
[Druggy] No
[Daydreamer] Yes
[Freak] Heylo
[Dork] Yes
[Bitch/Asshole] Yes
[Brat] yes
[Sarcastic] No I'm not
[Goody-goody] yes
[Angel] No
[Devil] No
[Shy]when I don't know you
[Talkative]too much
[Adventurous] Yes
[Joker] Yes but I'm not funny
[Flirty] Damn straight

Nigel? Are you gay?

2004-03-30T22:25:07Z

Ergh...Gay play thing at school...dammnit nothing good comes out of something good. In other words...I have to do a critique on the gay play about love and intimacy and sex that we say yesterday. I hate writing critiques. That play would have been better if they allowed me to tweek it up a notch though.

How come when people talk to young adults about sex and intimacy and love its always a boy and a girl. Its never, a guy and a guy or a girl and a girl or a guy and a guy and a girl etc. Its unfair since a lot of these kids will experiment with the same sex at one point or another and carrying a sexual relationship with the same sex is harder than a heterosexual one in terms of society.

One thing....why are males always portrayed as sex hungry bastards? Its always: Hey, if your gf says no, its no." what if you're a girl and you bf says no to you or you're a guy whos bf says no to you.

Nevermind me....

Hehe

You're Lolita!

by Vladimir Nabokov

Considered by most to be depraved and immoral, you are obsessed with
sex. What really tantalizes you is that which deviates from societal standards in every
way, though you admit that this probably isn't the best and you're not sure what causes
this desire. Nonetheless, you've done some pretty nefarious things in your life, and
probably gotten caught for them. The names have been changed, but the problems are real.
Please stay away from children.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Wow....obsession with sex....hmm....OOh...stay away from children? will do!

My brother was on t.v. this morning for his mechanical hand project. I feel so proud. The hand was amazing and he built it from crap you could find at dollar stores. But he only won 2nd place. No fair...a smaller version of the vending machine won. WTF...my brothers can help disabled people....a vending machine only helps fat people *lina* who are too lazy to get up and get a drink.

davenport_icons is growing pretty quickly. 23 members and 25 people friending it in a matter of two days. its crazy.

Phew....almost went without talking about jack davenport.

Nicki is a freakin horny bitch. My eldest bro and Jack are the same age and I was implying that they could get married. Nicki laughs I smack her and yell: my brother is married and has a son you bitch. He's not gonna go and marry Jack....cause he knows Jack is mine!

::giddy:: I'm getting the Talented mr. ripley soon....YAY! And Ray might have a copy of it (90%) and I'll just steal it from. I'll steal POTC from him too. Maybe he has the Bunker or Ultraviolet...or any other film that has jack in it.

Quote Jack: "naturally, naturally, darling!"

slave_monkey @ 2004-03-28T12:28:00

2004-03-28T17:45:57Z

I want to see the Talented Mr. ripley....I found pics of my Jack hugging Matt Damon in a very erm....::sweats:: I spent my entire weekend looking at Jack Davenport believe it or not. I still am.

I started a Jack Davenport community and by 1/2 an hour of being set up I have ...I think 3 members...not including me...

I like playing my sax but damn...I hate theory. I thought I had that freakin scale sheet in my bag..it was there when I left school thursday but its not there...and I don't have my algebra either. It was due Thursday...but the ceremony took up the period and we couldn't take it up. Brian was bitter at the ceremony, he only got 2 awards................I got one....and it was for history. Funny, the awards went to the most improved students and I dropped 2% and got the award.

I just realized that little fangirl fight resulted in 45 comments under that post I made over at the Jack davenport appreciation community....guh...I'm pure evil aren't I?

I stole some quizzes from Nancy again...

You are Form 9, Vampire: The Undying.

"And The Vampire was all that remained on
the blood drowned creation. She attempted to
regrow life from the dead. But as she was
about to give the breath of life, she was
consumed in the flame of The Phoenix and the
cycle began again."

Some examples of the Vampire Form are Hades (Greek)
and Isis (Egyptian).
The Vampire is associated with the concept of
death, the number 9, and the element of fire.
Her sign is the eclipsed moon.

As a member of Form 9, you are a very realistic
individual. You may be a little idealistic,
but you are very grounded and down to earth.
You realize that not everything lasts, but you
savor every minute of the good times. While
you may sometimes find yourself lonely, you
have strong ties with people that will never be
broken. Vampires are the best friends to have
because they are sensible.

Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Funny it actually fits..the description and all. I think I do savour my fake reality too much. I like it and I live in it no matter what people say. Its a happy fluffy place.

Everyone is always so angsty one way or another. Linas got that weird defensive and uncaring attitude because she has problems...and everyone else has problems and this post will be too long if I explain what I think of every single one of them. But me...I admit...my life isn't perfect but its pretty damn close. I realized that I can't use the excuse that I was separated from my mom for three years and that I hadn't met my dad until I was 7. Cause those times were the ones I was showered with everything my siblings could possibly give me. still even now I just have to say something and just be patient and I'll get it. Like my sister always said to me when I asked for something: "Just quit whining about and we'll get it for you. You know we can't stand it when you want something and never get it." its the magic of being the baby of the family. I'm a big girl but I still can't take care of myself cause I'm too freakin dependant on my family. Its nice..knowing that you will never lack anything cause your family will go to any lengths to give it to you. Even if they find it completely useless. Makes me wonder if I'm giving enough back..which leads to the answer NO, i'm not giving anything back to them. They give me the shit I want and I don't even say thank you cause its very hollywood like and overbearingly cheesy. I don't remember the last time I said thank you when they gave me something. Its like being in India in the 17th and 18th century where little girls were followed by Ayas.

Wow....massive little self bashing there.

I don't have a reason to be angsty. But I'm not anyways...I really am never really sad per se just....distant.